I finally experienced a bit of the Mommy Wars. This Saturday, I attended a pastry class at a local cooking school. The chef mentioned that I was looking really tired, and I said that I had a new baby at home, and I was exhausted, but happy to be out of the house.
One of the students, a woman in her fifties, came up to me later and asked how old my baby was. I told her that Bean was three months and change, and she screwed up her face and said “That old? I thought that you said you weren’t getting any sleep” And walked off.
Whatever, lady. Sleepwalk a mile in my shoes. But it didn’t end there.
Later on, she slithered back up to me and said “You know, I couldn’t be like you stay-at-home moms. I mean, I really need to feel like I’m accomplishing things, you know, actually doing something with my time.”
Too bad it was a pastry class. I could have really accomplished something with a cast iron skillet right about then.
Posted by Jen at August 21, 2006 4:27 PMIt never ceases to amaze my how rude people can be. At least you got some good blog fodder from it.
Posted by: susan at August 21, 2006 9:34 PMI just don't understand what in the world motivated her to insult me the second time. The first insult could have been accidental, but the second one couldn't have been: she had to make the effort to approach me and say that.
I just figure she wanted to stay home with her kids and couldn't, and now she's bitter and resentful.
Posted by: Jen Rodis at August 22, 2006 8:03 AMConsider, though, what probably transpired in between her two comments. She went back to her table, was most probably secretly watching a lovely young wife and mother who, although being tired, was involved in an activity for her own self-enrichment that she obviously enjoyed which did NOT involve burping, changing diapers, or sleeplessly rocking a baby in the middle of the night. She chose a path many years ago which was right for her at the time. She watched you, and recalled her own younger years, perhaps wishing that she had spent both more time with her own kids as well as time with herself, pursuing her own personal joys.
What motivated her now was envy. And she used bitter words towards you to rationalize her own guilt.
wow... where did all THAT profundity just come from? :o)
Posted by: mom at August 22, 2006 3:37 PMYou tell it, mom!
Posted by: Jen Rodis at August 22, 2006 3:48 PMOMG! Just read on another mommy's blog how her babysitter saw a picture of the mommy's wedding day and said something to the effect "Oh this was when you were thinner."!!!!
Makes you want to not just give these folks a 'stupid' sign, but repeatedly clock them over the head with it.
You're mom's right...this lady was wearing a particularly ugly shade of green during the class.
:-)
Posted by: Lisa at August 22, 2006 8:02 PMWhat a terrible thing for that woman to do!
Posted by: Shannon at August 24, 2006 5:48 PM