Dimitri's penis works.
Dimitri and I will welcome our first child in early May.
We had family and friends over for a Labor Day Barbeque, and I slipped them the news then. Nothing fancy, just "Happy Labor Day, and, by the way, I'm six weeks pregnant" People gasped (I hope they were happy gasps) and I was instantly set upon my rampaging, hugging women. I still don't know who all tackled me, so I would be of no use in a lineup.
The mothers cried, my dad had a mini-heart attack, and my Nana said "I knew it!"
Sophie even HUGGED me. She then told me that I better lay off the booze, since, in case I wasn't aware, alcohol was not good for her grandchild.
So I am NOT soliciting parenting advice, nor do I want to hear what a traumatizing, humiliating, and utterly disastrous experience your pregnancy was. I'm just diggin' the fact that I have a pig/octopus looking creature inside of me and I don't feel like barfing.
So congratulate me and tell me that my labor will be no more painful than petting a kitten. Then tell me that it's acceptable behavior to keep grandparents at bay with long, sharpened poles.
Posted by Jen at September 6, 2005 2:17 PMCongratulations!
Your pregnancy will be no more painful than petting a kitten. Your kitty's gonna be sore when it's all over, however.
(Inserting punchline drumroll) Ba Dum Bum...
Posted by: Jen Rodis at September 6, 2005 2:40 PMOmigosh! Wow! I'm so happy for you both! (thus all the exclamation points!)
Are you barefoot too?
Posted by: Stephanie at September 6, 2005 3:18 PMAt the moment, yes. But I just had my hair done, so I don't have the dark roots to match.
Posted by: Jen Rodis at September 6, 2005 3:27 PMHey Jen!
Congrats! That is so exciting! Labor will be a breeze!!! Best of luck!
Yay! Congratulations! You and my friend Jenn Klein (I guess) got knocked up around the same time! Good thing you're both married. :)
Posted by: JennySmith at September 6, 2005 6:01 PMOh my gosh! That is so great. I wish I could hug you. Here is a virtual hug. {} I will not offer any advice at all. Unless of course you ask me because after all I have raised one of the most exceptional children in the history of the world. Seriously though, I am SO happy for you and Dimitri.
Hey now you'll have more than enough fodder for blogging. :)
Posted by: susan at September 6, 2005 7:22 PMCongratulations!
1. Congratulations again to you both!!!
2. Labor is as easy as petting a kitten (a rabid lion kitten, that is)
3. Sharp sticks?.... OUCH! (but much less painful than petting that 'kitten')
4. Advice?.....Keep digging the joy of having that 'pig/octopus looking creature' inside of you. It makes all the kitten petting and sharp sticks worth it!
tell the fleshy mass i said hi and i'm sorry i missed its first family gathering.
Posted by: kat at September 7, 2005 8:55 AMGreat news! Congrats!! (Loved the intro line ot this post, by the way. Got my attention REAL QUICK!)
Posted by: Cladeedah at September 7, 2005 8:41 PMCongratulations!
But I'm soooooo glad that I'm a gay guy. I would hate to have a "sore kitty" or have to pet "sore kitty." A sore kitty would probably have a bad temperament. I hope you have had your kitty de-clawed.