Levedy

Murphy Likes Trannies

Picture it:

The prostitute calling cards are rambling around the bottom of my purse for a week because I’m too lazy to get them out and post about them. Like any unwanted receipt or gum wrapper that floats in any woman’s purse, these cards float to the top of the detritus pile every so often.

So there I am, in the Taco Bell drive thru at 11:00 at night, ordering food that no human should consume, and lo and behold, Murphy’s Law decides to be ratified right across my fragile ego.

I reach into my purse to grab the fiver that I knew was rattling around my purse, and out comes Juicy Georgia Peach alongside a greenish (but smug-looking) Lincoln. The Taco Bell employee and I realize exactly what is in my hand at the exact same moment. We both shrink away; he into the confines of the building and I into the burned out husk that is my sense of confidence.

Now, you’d THINK that would teach me to get the prostitutes out of my purse...

I was at the library with a student reviewing Reading Comprehension techniques for his upcoming LSAT. I reach blindly into my purse for two sticks of bubble gum and *FWAP* I fling Joyful Goddess Geisha (who I swear is a trannie) across the table at Corey along with some sugar free Extra.

shit shit shit shit shit shit

So I came home and posted about them. Coincidentally, I had house guests from Utah staying with us that night. I thought that the cards would make wonderful souvenirs for them to take back to Salt Lake City:

Next post: pigeon internment camps, how the fuse box affects marriages, and Miss Mannersopolous on the proper way to invite Greeks to a soiree...

Posted by Jen at August 12, 2005 10:12 AM