Levedy

$47, What a Deal!

Of all the lovely “models” pictured on the prostitute cards I picked up, my personal favorite is Tia.

For $47.00, you can spend time with a gal who looks like she might be president of your high school’s Asian Student Honor Society. The Pro Asian Student Honor Society...

While the card doesn’t say what $47 will get you (math tutoring?), she’s clearly the entertainment for the value-conscious traveling business man. Her $47 is paltry compared to “sweet n’ soft Sandi” ($85) and the my mouth opens too wide to be normal BLONDE BOMBSHELL BIANCA ($65). “Juicy Georgia Peach” does not list her price, which says to me that she’s the top quality hooker:if you have to ask my price, trust me baby, you can’t afford me.

The best part of Tia’s card is the back side. (The best part of Tia may not be her backside – it isn’t pictured on the card)

Hmm...if I don’t like her I can send her back (to Thailand)...NO CHARGE. It sounds like the poor girl’s gonna get deported by INS if I don’t like her backside. Sure, there may be NO (financial) OBLIGATION, but the guilt! Oy gevalt!

It’s comforting to know that her services are discreetly billed to my MC, VISA, or AMEX (She doesn’t take discover, apparently) Businessmen, your credit card charges for that convention in Vegas will look like this:

Mandalay Bay $560.00
Hard Rock Café $65.00
Cash Advance: $1000.00
Lee’s Discount Liquor: $52.00
Diversity Tattoo: $63.00
Virgin Music – Cher’s farewell tour $14.99
Las Vegas Metropolitan Police – Fine – Public Nuisance Music $300.00
Tia – Personal Entertainment Service: $47.00
Las Vegas Free Herpes Clinic: priceless

No guys, that won’t look at all suspicious on the old expense account.

One more note before I move on:

Okay, so she takes all major credit cards....Where is her card reader?

Yes, that was tasteless.

Next up – Sweet Georgia Peach’s adventures in the drive-thru!

Posted by Jen at August 10, 2005 9:25 AM